I know I’m old fashioned and I know that texting is one of the favorite ways of communicating by millennials and the gen z generations. I can tell you that I’m not a fan. Since texting has no inflection of voice the words in a text come across cold and callus. It causes conflict between the parties conversing when the issues can be addressed in a kinder way. Empathy is lost in a text. If there is an issue of conflict between you and someone you care about don’t use texting as the favored type of communication. Just pick up the phone and call them. It will go a long way in solving a conflict graciously and passionately.

I am a vitamin D junkie. I love sunshine. It’s uplifting to my spirit. My mood changes dramatically for the worse when there are consecutive dark dreary days in the winter’s of St. Louis. Seasonal depression is real but I’m going to give you some simple ideas that you can do that will make those gray days a little brighter.

Plant an Indoor Garden:

My favorite season is spring because all of the plants wake up and I’m energized by the rebirth that occurs throughout my yard. Now I know that everyone doesn’t have a “green thumb” but there are some plants that almost anyone can grow. They are called succulents. You only have to water them once a week. You can buy them for a very small price at places like Home Depot or Walmart. Pick a bright location in your house where you can sit and read, watch tv, or do your favorite indoor activity and then surround yourself with several pots of succulents. I bet it will make you feel like you are experiencing a pretty spring day. For those of you who are more adventurous, growing a small herb garden in a window sill or in a western facing window is lots of fun. Mint, basil, rosemary, and oregano are common herbs that you can find at most Trader Joe’s in small pots. Water them a small amount, twice a week. Here’s a tip, it’s better to underwater than overwater your herb garden. After a couple of weeks, snip off a part of the herbs and use them in your favorite recipe or even better, your favorite cocktail. This is my number one activity that lifts my spirits on dreary days.

Exercise:

Getting my body moving really helps. For me, I need to do something that makes me sweat. This can be accomplished by walking quickly, jogging on a treadmill, walking up and down steps or a stair stepping machine, pedaling on a stationary bike or a Peloton if you are lucky enough to have one, or playing some sport that gets your heart beating quickly. I’m not a swimmer but swimming is a great stress reliever too. After I’m finished exercising I feel more content and less anxious about the weather.

Get Outside Any Chance You Get:

Unless you live above the Arctic Circle and with the advent of global warming, there will inevitably be some nice days in the wintertime. Don’t let those days go wasted! Get outside and go for a walk, hit golf balls, read a book in your back yard, just do something outside. It will make you feel much better.

Plan a Weekend Getaway Somewhere Sunny:

Now I know many of us don’t have the ability or the wherewithal to fly or drive to somewhere warm and sunny in the winter. I get it. Maybe when you are planning out your vacation days in the coming year instead of just planning a long summer vacation bank some of those days to plan a weekend getaway at the end of January or February. Those are the times that are the worst for me so I plan a weekend away during that time of year. It gets me get “over the hump” and I can see on the horizon that spring is not too far away!

What Are Your Secrets That You Do To Beat The Winter Blues?

I would love to know your thoughts on the subject and give me some ideas that I might be able to do in my life. Thanks!

Recently at Thanksgiving giving dinner at my daughter’s house I looked around this table and there were 22 of us. It’s rare that we are all together at one time. That is what makes Thanksgiving so special to me.

A renaissance is defined as a rebirth from a stagnant period in history. Like Europe’s renaissance which began in the14th century, the Millner family renaissance is about to begin in the 21st century. The size of our family has not changed for a long time but that is about to change in a big way. Over the next decade, there will be an explosion of new family members through marriage and new offspring that will be unprecedented, that will not be duplicated for a long long time. Maybe this is a common occurrence in families when the grandchildren move into their fifties and sixties. I don’t know. Have you seen that happening in your family?

Now the only way the Millner renaissance can be a positive piece of history is if the older generation has set the family up for success. This is a tough one because all families have disfunction in some way or another. The degree of disfunction varies greatly. As I looked round the room at the amazing children and their significant others it just took my breath away. I guess we did something a little bit right, out maybe we were just lucky. They are all unique individuals, but they share some qualities that make them extraordinary people. The kindness, compassion, and love that you show for each other and the others that they touch on a daily basis is truly inspiring. Hopefully, they can become the “Millner’s 2.0”.

However, I would like to give some advice to the peers of my kids who read this post. We can all use this advice but it’s harder to change older people’s minds since they are already so set in their ways.

Here it is: Over the next decade there will be tremendous changes in your lives. With change comes anxiety. When you are going through those trying times just remember to be true to your heart, and think about all of the things that you have to be thankful for. Just don’t get bogged down on the little things and don’t waste any energy on the things that are out of your control. Always be aware of the big picture. If you do that everything will be ok.

1. Listen more and talk less.
2. Find other interests besides work. Work should only be part of your life. It shouldn’t dictate it.
3. Understand there will be bad times at work as well as in life but they will pass. Most jobs are cyclical. Hopefully, you feel there are more good times than bad. If not find something else to do.
4. Go out of your way to be nice to people. Especially people who are your subordinates. The nicer you are to those people the more things you get in return. Make sure people you work with know how much you appreciate their hard work. I tell my staff everyday as I leave thank you for all they do. You want them to feel special.
5. Never burn a bridge. Because you never know when that person might be back in your life.
6. Reward yourself when you succeed. Life is hard enough not to enjoy the fruits of your labor. Go to dinner, buy a new outfit, just do something special and fun for yourself.
7. Try to keep the big picture in mind when your life gets tough and be patient.
8. Be humble
9. There is no easy way to success. It takes hard work.
10. Your reputation in life is precious. Always protect it. Don’t throw it away over something foolish.

I’m not a very religious person. However, twice a year I go to high holiday services at my local synagogue. My family has been a member since I was 13 years old.. As I have gotten older I enjoy going more and more. I like going with my mom and my step dad and being assured of seeing the retired rabbi who resided over my bar mitzvah 43 years ago! It’s nice knowing some things don’t change. But wait, this year there were tons of changes. I didn’t mind that the sanctuary got a multi-million dollar face lift or the organ was replaced by a 4 piece band and an expanded choir. What was at first disturbing was the new prayer books that guided the congregants through the service. The prayer book had many different prayers and so many of the traditional readings vanished. The powers to be wanted to modernize the service to make it more relevant. How dare they! It has always been comforting to know that something’s don’t change. Alas, even something like high holiday services that have been conducted for over 5000 years has succumbed to modernization. I guess it’s just the way life goes. When the service concluded I kissed my mom and wished her a happy new year like I have for as long as I can remember. It was as enjoyable and comforting as it was the previous year even though the experience reminded me that things are always changing.