What are the qualities of a perfect toilet? Good question—it’s definitely in the eyes of the beholder. What are the biggest factors that determine one’s favorite toilet? Is it an age thing, a comfort thing, or do a number of factors matter to most people?

Before I dwell on this most important subject let me give you a little history of the flush toilet. According to an article published by the British Association of Urological Surgeons they write, “It is a widely-held belief that Thomas Crapper designed the first flush toilet in the 1860s. It was actually 300 years earlier, during the 16th century, that Europe discovered modern sanitation. The credit for inventing the flush toilet goes to Sir John Harrington, godson of Elizabeth I, who invented a water closet with a raised cistern and a small downpipe through which water ran to flush the waste in 1592. He built one for himself and one for his godmother; sadly, his invention was ignored for almost 200 years: it was was not until 1775 that Alexander Cummings, a watchmaker, developed the S-shaped pipe under the toilet basin to keep out the foul odours.” Thanks so much Sir Harrington!

Enough of the history lesson; that’s not the purpose of this post. What makes a “perfect toilet”? I have never polled my friends on the subject, but when you bring it up, I find that people have some pretty interesting opinions on it.

To Be Rinsed or Not to Be Rinsed?

Last year, our family took a trip to Japan, which was truly incredible. The people were so polite, and the cities were so clean you could eat off the streets. Even their toilets were pristine. The one common thread there was that virtually all of their toilets had a “rinse and fan dry” feature before flushing. It was pretty interesting because I wasn’t used to that sensation, having been just a “wiper” for over 60 years. I bet you’ve heard the saying, “You can’t teach an old dog new tricks.” Well, that’s how I felt about the Toto toilet! It just wasn’t my “jam.” In fact, in our hotel, you could choose to skip the “rinse and fan dry” feature, which I opted to do. However, I can understand why so many people like it because it seems less barbaric than the old fashioned way.

Fast forward to my humble abode at home where we now have 3 different types of toilets. Each of them have some unique qualities that cover the full spectrum of commodes.

The Chic One:

Five years ago, we decided to give our kitchen and guest bathroom a “facelift.” Our tastes lean toward the contemporary side, so our decorator provided us with some choices for the guest bathroom. The first time I used the chic new design, I noticed that the seat was rather narrow and not very comfortable. It was also a bit too high for me, and it has two flush settings depending on how much water you need to use. Both settings use significantly less water, which helps the environment. However, unfortunately, that could be a big problem. The water flow after I flushed—let’s just say it isn’t adequate. It’s not just a “one and done” power flush cycle; I had to flush it at least once or twice more. How annoying is that?

The Toto Toilet:

What an amazing invention, the Toto toilet. It’s comfortable, it’s got a heated seat, it’s got several different rinse cycles it’s amazing. Like I said before I just can’t get my head around the whole rinse thing. There is just something about it that makes me feel a little violated. It’s not my favorite.

The Basement Toilet:

We have a basement bathroom that, aside from new paint and a new light fixture, has not been changed in 25 years. The brand of this toilet is American Standard. American Standard originated in 1929 and has gone through various stages of change. Through all of that though, they are still one of the largest sellers of toilets in the country. We have their standard toilet in our very unassuming yet comfortable basement bathroom. Since it is 25 years old, it has no water flow restrictions, making it a one-flush wonder! It’s the perfect height from the floor, and the seat is wide and comfortable. That’s my winner!

The simple things in life have become more important to me as I’ve grown older. I don’t know if I’m trying to hold on to the past or if I’m just too stubborn to accept change. Either way, I do know how much everyone likes their own special toilet for various reasons. So next time you’re at a party and need an icebreaker to start a conversation with someone, I bet asking about their toilet preferences will be a good way to start!

Cheers!