Three years ago I posted a blog about friends and friendships. The gist of the post was to never take them for granted. Fast forward three years to the present and friends and friendships are on my mind again.

Why are we friends with some people and not others?  To me it’s simple but to some people it’s not that evident.  So here is my “two cents worth” on what makes a good friend.

10 Ingredients Needed to Have a Best Friend

1. They have to be the same sex as you.
2. They have to have the same interests as you.
3. You have to be able to see each other in person often.
4. Both of you are willing to put in the time to be always present in each other’s lives.
5. They have to be able to be a good listener and be insightful on things that are going on in your life.
6. They have to be a positive person.
7. They do not judge you on what is going on your life presently. 
8. They can keep a secret and thus you can can tell them anything. 
9. They have to have pretty much the same values as yours.
10. They make you laugh.

Now do this exercise. List all of the people in your life who you consider a friend and see how many of these “boxes you can check” for each of them. I bet the your closest friend you have checks the most or all of the boxes.

Recently, I lost my best friend who checked all of the boxes. That has put a big hole in my life. I probably will never have another friend in my life where all of the boxes are checked. I’m working on trying to elevate my existing friendships to a higher level but it’s very hard to do. You just can’t force it.

If you are lucky enough to have a friend that checks all of the boxes savior that relationship with all of your heart and soul because those relationships are few and far between in one’s life. Appreciate everyday with that friend and make sure they know how much you appreciate their place in your life.